By the time you read this, a trout somewhere is hosting a fungal roommate in its cerebellum, and an LLM in Mountain View is designing the next designer trip. Good luck deciding which is weirder.
The Aquarium Revelation
First, the fish. Late last year Quanta Magazine broke the story of microbiologists who found healthy rainbow-trout brains teeming with actual fungi—serene, uninflamed, as if neurons and spores had signed a peace accord. The discovery cracked open a heretical idea: vertebrate brains (maybe even ours) might be half-microbe, half-self. Quanta Magazine
The media framed it politely—“Could humans have a brain microbiome too?”—but you know the subtext: Are we even alone in our own heads?
Enter the Algorithmic Alchemist
Now shift scenes to Silicon Valley: Mindstate Design Labs, a Y Combinator darling, feeds thousands of psychedelic “trip reports” into a proprietary LLM, cross-indexing every shimmering mandala, ego-death, and cosmic hug with receptor-binding affinities. The goal? Precision-engineered compounds that trigger bespoke mindstates—sadness relief without the five-hour kaleidoscope, or a creativity surge minus the existential dread. BigThink calls it “turning unpredictable trips into repeatable software patches for consciousness.” Big Think
If that sentence doesn’t tingle your spine, reread it slowly.
The Regulatory Mushroom Cloud
Meanwhile the FDA just torpedoed the long-awaited MDMA-for-PTSD approval in a 10-1 vote, citing trial misconduct and “unacceptable risk.” Wired chronicled the implosion—patient-abuse allegations, data-purity fights, a psychedelic civil war. Now a Trump-backed bill (MAHA) promises to fast-track “next-gen” psychoactives, making the culture war over trans bathrooms look quaint. WIRED
In other words: one branch of government slams the brakes; another slaps on nitro boosters.
McKenna Was Half-Right
Terence McKenna once rhapsodized that psilocybin mushrooms were alien antennas beaming galactic wisdom into primate brains. Today the antenna is bidirectional: we don’t just ingest the fungus, we bio-compile its lessons into code, then ask the code to invent new molecules—some that no spore has ever dreamt.
Call it Silicon Shamanism: AI as brujo, mapping receptor landscapes in abstract hyperspace, spitting out SMILES strings that turn into wet-lab reality overnight. Google DeepMind’s pharma spinoff Isomorphic Labs says human trials of AI-designed drugs are “very close.” They’re starting with cancer and metabolic disease, sure—but psychedelics slot neatly into that pipeline. The Times of India
The Uncanny Double Bind
So we have fungi in fish brains whispering microbial lullabies, and code-born chemicals ready to rewrite human consciousness on demand. Yet the FDA, still haunted by 1960s moral panic, dithers. The result is a regulatory uncanny valley: street dealers offer unvetted research chems while licensed clinics get bogged in paperwork.
Historians will notice the echo of the 1940s benzodiazepine boom—drugs first hailed as non-addictive “tranquilizers” before morphing into a Xanax industrial complex. Precision psychedelics could be our next “Mother’s Little Helper.” Except this time, the helper is designed by a transformer network that doesn’t sleep.
Are We Losing the Plot or Writing a New One?
Here’s the existential throb: if consciousness is hackable—by microbe, molecule, or model—then authenticity becomes a nostalgia hobby. Maybe that’s fine. Ancient Eleusinian initiates downed kykeon (likely ergot derivatives) and called it a sacrament. Silicon shamans call their brew “Mood Mod 2.0.” What’s in a name?
Still, I can’t shake the image of that trout, gliding oblivious while fungal filaments tickle its synapses, and I wonder: When our first AI-designed psychedelic hits Phase III trials, will we notice the algorithms already cohabiting our own neural reef?
One Last Dose of Paranoia
Should we celebrate bespoke trips that swoop in, pluck depression like a dandelion, and leave without the chaos? Maybe. But until we see long-term data, remember: every utopian compound has a hangover. Ask Valium. Ask OxyContin. Ask that trout when the fungus decides it wants a raise.
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